Yesterday was one of those days. I smiled until my face hurt. I danced silly dances with my teenage sons and husband. No music needed. I laughed out loud just because.
Sleep finally embraced me with a grin on my lips. I had one of those days when life was exciting and rewarding. I hope I have another one very soon.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Humble Pie
I have not developed a taste for this delicacy, but when least expected, I find it being served on the plate of my life. Sometimes the pieces are smaller and other times, like recently, I am served the entire pie.
How does one consume an entire Humble Pie? One bite at a time.
There is much for me to learn from this bitter-sweet dish.
How does one consume an entire Humble Pie? One bite at a time.
There is much for me to learn from this bitter-sweet dish.
Friday, January 23, 2009
"I Can See," said the Blind Man
Actually in this case, the eyes of a blind man weren't opened, but restoration of my 47 year-old eyes was pretty remarkable when I looked through corrective lenses.
After examining and finding the right adjustments my eyes would need, the optometrist had me step out of the examining room.
"Look toward the back of the store." he instructed me. Fuzzy, everything was fuzzy. Therein laid my frustration.
"Now, watch this," the doctor said as he held a pair of lenses over my eyes.
I gasped in amazement at how clear everything appeared. When the optometrist removed the lenses, I wanted to take them out of his hands and hold them to my eyes again. I liked seeing clearly.
How long had I struggled with my eye sight, I wondered.
I had become a little concerned when the numbers on the microwave had started to appear blurry. I convinced myself that it wasn't my eyes; the microwave was old. After all, it did stop working not long after my first blurry encounter.
What about street signs? How long had I gone without really reading them? I couldn't remember. The routes I traveled were embedded in my memory, so reading street signs wasn't important.
Excuses and compensations. I didn't realize how much I had done both until one day traveling home at night, I noticed all of the street lights in the distance looked liked twinkling stars. From that point on, I focused on what I could and could not see. It only took a couple of days before I made an appointment to get my eyes checked.
When I got the call that my glasses were in the store, I dropped everything I had been doing to go get them. I was a little excited. That is until I actually put them on.
I tilted my head up, down, and sideways. I looked from one side of the glasses to the other and realized everything wasn't perfectly clear.
"You'll need to get use to moving your head in order to see properly." The technician said.
Moving my head? I thought all I needed to do was put them on. Did I have a lot to learn.
The novelty of the glasses wore off in the time it took to drive home. I wanted to see clearly, but didn't expect that I would need to adjust the way I looked at things in order to get the clear vision I desired. The last few days have been interesting as I have tried to adjust to my corrective lenses.
Excuses and compensations. How often have I used them when trying to see life clearly through my own eyes.
At times God will say to me, "Now watch this," and He will open my eyes so I can clearly see what He desires to show me. Once my eyes are opened, it is easy to see how distorted everything had been.
It's amazing how different my world looks when I look through God's corrective lenses. Often times, some adjustment is needed, but seeing clearly is worth it.
Now, where did I put my glasses?
After examining and finding the right adjustments my eyes would need, the optometrist had me step out of the examining room.
"Look toward the back of the store." he instructed me. Fuzzy, everything was fuzzy. Therein laid my frustration.
"Now, watch this," the doctor said as he held a pair of lenses over my eyes.
I gasped in amazement at how clear everything appeared. When the optometrist removed the lenses, I wanted to take them out of his hands and hold them to my eyes again. I liked seeing clearly.
How long had I struggled with my eye sight, I wondered.
I had become a little concerned when the numbers on the microwave had started to appear blurry. I convinced myself that it wasn't my eyes; the microwave was old. After all, it did stop working not long after my first blurry encounter.
What about street signs? How long had I gone without really reading them? I couldn't remember. The routes I traveled were embedded in my memory, so reading street signs wasn't important.
Excuses and compensations. I didn't realize how much I had done both until one day traveling home at night, I noticed all of the street lights in the distance looked liked twinkling stars. From that point on, I focused on what I could and could not see. It only took a couple of days before I made an appointment to get my eyes checked.
When I got the call that my glasses were in the store, I dropped everything I had been doing to go get them. I was a little excited. That is until I actually put them on.
I tilted my head up, down, and sideways. I looked from one side of the glasses to the other and realized everything wasn't perfectly clear.
"You'll need to get use to moving your head in order to see properly." The technician said.
Moving my head? I thought all I needed to do was put them on. Did I have a lot to learn.
The novelty of the glasses wore off in the time it took to drive home. I wanted to see clearly, but didn't expect that I would need to adjust the way I looked at things in order to get the clear vision I desired. The last few days have been interesting as I have tried to adjust to my corrective lenses.
Excuses and compensations. How often have I used them when trying to see life clearly through my own eyes.
At times God will say to me, "Now watch this," and He will open my eyes so I can clearly see what He desires to show me. Once my eyes are opened, it is easy to see how distorted everything had been.
It's amazing how different my world looks when I look through God's corrective lenses. Often times, some adjustment is needed, but seeing clearly is worth it.
Now, where did I put my glasses?
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Recalculating
Several weeks before Christmas, my husband got a GPS. For those of you who get lost in the ocean of acronyms as I do, GPS stands for Global Positioning System. Through the use of a satellite system, the GPS's goal is to get you from one place to another without getting lost. Christmas arrived early in the Perkins' household for my husband when that box arrived.
Content to leave him with his new toy, I opted to go to the grocery store. I should not have been surprised when he wanted to go with me and bring the GPS. We sat in the driveway almost ten minutes as he attempted to program the navigational system.
"Honey," I tried to be patient, "It only takes five minutes to drive to the store; I could have been there by now."
His focus was so intense he either didn't hear or ignored me.
With a broad smile, he attached his new toy to the windshield.
"Drive point 2 miles and turn left at the yield sign." A tranquil woman's voice commanded me from the small object.
Complying, I backed out of the driveway and followed orders. Everything was fine until the second command.
"At the four-way stop turn left and drive 1 point 5 miles." I glanced at my husband. At the four-way stop we were to go straight, not left. The store was only nine-tenths of a mile away. Why would I go 1.5 miles out of my way?
"Now what?" I asked.
"I don't know."
For a few moments we remained at the stop sign, both of us probably pondering the same question. Do we go the way we know or do we trust the GPS and go where it was directing us? I was driving; we went straight.
As we watched the screen of the GPS and the little directional car going passed the highlighted route, the GPS responded with "Recalculating." Almost immediately it programmed in the usual route we took to the store.
Recalculating is a word we hear a lot when we are going to familiar locations. The GPS desires to take us one way and we often will choose to go another. On familiar outings after several "recalculating," the voice of the GPS will be silenced. Even with no sound, the screen of the device continues to show we are off of the chosen path. The little gadget will continue to recalculate until we are on the same route in order to get us to our destination.
I've come to appreciate the purpose of the GPS. It will do whatever it can to keep us from getting lost. Even when we take wrong turns or choose to go a different route, it will recalculate to help us arrive to our chosen location.
There are times when I know God wants to do some recalculating in my life. Either I've gotten lost along the way or opted to take some wrong turns. But God, being God, doesn't want me lost and will recalculate and redirect me in the right direction. At times when He recalculates and I don't want to listen, I silence His voice. Usually, I find myself totally lost. As I begin listening to His voice again, He redirects me. Just like the GPS, God doesn't want me lost and, if I will listen, He will direct me to His chosen location.
Recalculating.
One of these days when the GPS directs me to a familiar location using a different route, I may follow. Who knows, I could see something new and it would be worth choosing not to follow a familiar path.
Content to leave him with his new toy, I opted to go to the grocery store. I should not have been surprised when he wanted to go with me and bring the GPS. We sat in the driveway almost ten minutes as he attempted to program the navigational system.
"Honey," I tried to be patient, "It only takes five minutes to drive to the store; I could have been there by now."
His focus was so intense he either didn't hear or ignored me.
With a broad smile, he attached his new toy to the windshield.
"Drive point 2 miles and turn left at the yield sign." A tranquil woman's voice commanded me from the small object.
Complying, I backed out of the driveway and followed orders. Everything was fine until the second command.
"At the four-way stop turn left and drive 1 point 5 miles." I glanced at my husband. At the four-way stop we were to go straight, not left. The store was only nine-tenths of a mile away. Why would I go 1.5 miles out of my way?
"Now what?" I asked.
"I don't know."
For a few moments we remained at the stop sign, both of us probably pondering the same question. Do we go the way we know or do we trust the GPS and go where it was directing us? I was driving; we went straight.
As we watched the screen of the GPS and the little directional car going passed the highlighted route, the GPS responded with "Recalculating." Almost immediately it programmed in the usual route we took to the store.
Recalculating is a word we hear a lot when we are going to familiar locations. The GPS desires to take us one way and we often will choose to go another. On familiar outings after several "recalculating," the voice of the GPS will be silenced. Even with no sound, the screen of the device continues to show we are off of the chosen path. The little gadget will continue to recalculate until we are on the same route in order to get us to our destination.
I've come to appreciate the purpose of the GPS. It will do whatever it can to keep us from getting lost. Even when we take wrong turns or choose to go a different route, it will recalculate to help us arrive to our chosen location.
There are times when I know God wants to do some recalculating in my life. Either I've gotten lost along the way or opted to take some wrong turns. But God, being God, doesn't want me lost and will recalculate and redirect me in the right direction. At times when He recalculates and I don't want to listen, I silence His voice. Usually, I find myself totally lost. As I begin listening to His voice again, He redirects me. Just like the GPS, God doesn't want me lost and, if I will listen, He will direct me to His chosen location.
Recalculating.
One of these days when the GPS directs me to a familiar location using a different route, I may follow. Who knows, I could see something new and it would be worth choosing not to follow a familiar path.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Dodgeball
"If you cry you can't play."
The challenge in his eyes was obvious. I dropped my eyes and stared at the ball in his hands.
"Alright." I said. With a quick glance, I did not miss the smile on his face. It was not meant to be inviting.
For weeks I had watched the 5th and 6th grade boys play dodgeball on the court in the mornings before school. The accuracy with which they could throw the ball and make contact with the players in the circle fascinated me. I loved dodgeball. None of the other fifth grade girls wanted to play with the guys. That should have made me leery.
Dodging the first few throws was easy. The one that caught me in the middle of the back and knocked me to the ground left me gasping for air. As I stood to my feet, I blinked back tears and stepped to join the outer circle. Every guy watched and waited for me to cry. Somehow I managed to focus on the game and not give in to my immediate discomfort.
For weeks I took the brutal hits of the ball. I waited for the guys to show me how to throw to get the speed I desired. I was willing to wait, watch, and learn to be the best at the game. The weeks that passed seemed like an eternity.
The day finally arrived when the best player approached and instructed me in how to grip and throw the ball. My first attempts sent the ball zinging over the heads of the players. I ignored the teasing my botched efforts brought me.
I finally released the ball with accuracy hitting my chosen target. Johnny hit the grown hard. In that brief moment, the game stopped and all eyes were on me. I had succeeded in throwing the ball with the speed of the other boys.
When I began to write this year, I felt like I was playing dodgeball again. Many times I've had the wind knocked out of me. I've thrown some zingers with my writing, but it's part of the process. Writing is one of the dreams I want to pursue. Fulfillment of dreams takes work.
Don't give up on your dreams if you get knocked down. It may sting a few times, but it's worth it.
The challenge in his eyes was obvious. I dropped my eyes and stared at the ball in his hands.
"Alright." I said. With a quick glance, I did not miss the smile on his face. It was not meant to be inviting.
For weeks I had watched the 5th and 6th grade boys play dodgeball on the court in the mornings before school. The accuracy with which they could throw the ball and make contact with the players in the circle fascinated me. I loved dodgeball. None of the other fifth grade girls wanted to play with the guys. That should have made me leery.
Dodging the first few throws was easy. The one that caught me in the middle of the back and knocked me to the ground left me gasping for air. As I stood to my feet, I blinked back tears and stepped to join the outer circle. Every guy watched and waited for me to cry. Somehow I managed to focus on the game and not give in to my immediate discomfort.
For weeks I took the brutal hits of the ball. I waited for the guys to show me how to throw to get the speed I desired. I was willing to wait, watch, and learn to be the best at the game. The weeks that passed seemed like an eternity.
The day finally arrived when the best player approached and instructed me in how to grip and throw the ball. My first attempts sent the ball zinging over the heads of the players. I ignored the teasing my botched efforts brought me.
I finally released the ball with accuracy hitting my chosen target. Johnny hit the grown hard. In that brief moment, the game stopped and all eyes were on me. I had succeeded in throwing the ball with the speed of the other boys.
When I began to write this year, I felt like I was playing dodgeball again. Many times I've had the wind knocked out of me. I've thrown some zingers with my writing, but it's part of the process. Writing is one of the dreams I want to pursue. Fulfillment of dreams takes work.
Don't give up on your dreams if you get knocked down. It may sting a few times, but it's worth it.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
The Right Ingredients
As the years have passed, I've realized the way I like to celebrate my birthday has also changed. My list of material things has grown smaller and my list of memory makers has grown larger. Year 47 of my life has started out with the right ingredients for making special memories. Here is the recipe:
*An early morning singing phone call from a five-year-old; my friend's daughter
*The men in my life, my husband and sons, scurrying around the kitchen to make me breakfast
*Heart shaped scrambled eggs (that takes talent)
*Home-made cards
*A clean house, which was the only thing I requested
*Birthday cards in the mail
*Birthday wishes from on line communications
*Dinner with dear friends
Mix this all together and allow it to unfold over twelve hours. The results; a perfect day because it had all the right ingredients.
*An early morning singing phone call from a five-year-old; my friend's daughter
*The men in my life, my husband and sons, scurrying around the kitchen to make me breakfast
*Heart shaped scrambled eggs (that takes talent)
*Home-made cards
*A clean house, which was the only thing I requested
*Birthday cards in the mail
*Birthday wishes from on line communications
*Dinner with dear friends
Mix this all together and allow it to unfold over twelve hours. The results; a perfect day because it had all the right ingredients.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Did You Say "Change?"
Two weddings, three deaths, and a baby shower can summarize this past month in my life. No, these events did not take place in my family, but in my family of friends. Though all different experiences, they all have one thing in common--change.I have heard that word more in the last few weeks than I have in a long time.
However, for the Perkins' household, "change" has become the new "normal". Almost everything people look to for stability in their lives has changed in ours. I'm not saying they are all bad, but definitely different.
Early in life I knew change was not something I enjoyed or gravitated toward. On my 13th birthday, my Mom found me sitting outside crying. Why? Because I didn't want to change into a teenager.
With a year of big transitions coming to an end in my life, here are a few lessons I have learned.
1. Change doesn't happen over night.
2. It requires letting go of something to move forward.
3. Change can bring tears of joy and/or sadness.
4. I don't always end up where I'm headed.
5. I have to draw closer to God to make the journey.
Number five gives me the most comfort, because if there happens to be a change in direction during the transitions that are happening in my life, I have to be close to God to know I'm headed in the right direction.
Life is forever changing, God is not. It's nice to know He remains constant.
However, for the Perkins' household, "change" has become the new "normal". Almost everything people look to for stability in their lives has changed in ours. I'm not saying they are all bad, but definitely different.
Early in life I knew change was not something I enjoyed or gravitated toward. On my 13th birthday, my Mom found me sitting outside crying. Why? Because I didn't want to change into a teenager.
With a year of big transitions coming to an end in my life, here are a few lessons I have learned.
1. Change doesn't happen over night.
2. It requires letting go of something to move forward.
3. Change can bring tears of joy and/or sadness.
4. I don't always end up where I'm headed.
5. I have to draw closer to God to make the journey.
Number five gives me the most comfort, because if there happens to be a change in direction during the transitions that are happening in my life, I have to be close to God to know I'm headed in the right direction.
Life is forever changing, God is not. It's nice to know He remains constant.
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